(This is where it all began…) Generally speaking if the masses love it, my husband and I probably will not. It happens all the time with movies. If it wins every award for everything possible, I’ll probably fall asleep. I don’t know if it’s a desire to specifically
not like it, or my own feeling that the general public has given up and completely succumb to just loving
everything. And yes, I
GET the movie, I just don’t like it.
I’m a pretty picky person when it comes to food (and movies). I blame that on
Top Chef. I’m trained to pick out every element that’s wrong in a meal. When my husband mentioned the mania surrounding
Five Guys, I hesitantly said, “OK, let’s try it.” So we did.

Being that we live in California, we have access to
In-N-Out, a very popular burger chain. The comparison among our friends became, “Which is better? In-N-Out or Five Guys?” I love a good compare and contrast, especially when food is involved. When we go to In-N-Out, which to be totally honest isn’t that often (it’s good, but it’s not
wait on line no matter what time of day it is for at least 15 minutes good), my hubs will get the double double (that’s double patty, double cheese) with ketchup only. For me, the more I can pile on the better. I go for the regular single patty with cheese, spread (basically thousand island), tomato, lettuce and I’ll add the grilled onions off the secret menu. Here’s their “
secret menu” if you care to see all the “secret” options. We knew to be fair we had to order the same at Five Guys as we do at In-N-Out.
We get to Five Guys and see a line out the door, take a peek inside and notice every table is packed. I instantly felt like turning around and not being suckered in to this craziness! We knew we came for a reason, can’t turn back now! We hopped on to the line and waited until it was our turn. To be fair, we were not on line very long at all. A perk, one that In-N-Out does not have, is that there are boxes of peanuts you can munch on while you wait. Now this can be taken as a good thing and as a bad thing. On one hand, yay! peanuts! I love a little snacky while I wait. On the other hand, why do they feel we need a snack while we’re on line? Do they know it’s gonna be
that long so give the hungry people something to keep them happy? I’m not going to lie, the peanuts were fun, and I made my husband open them for me, so I made out pretty well.

We get to the counter and make our selections. The
menu isn’t too crazy. We both order the cheeseburger. He gets it with ketchup only, I get mine with pretty much everything but the kitchen sink. I go for the mayo, relish, lettuce, pickles, tomatoes, grilled onions, grilled mushrooms and ketchup. Oink.
The cheery teenager behind the counter asks if we want our fries cajun style or regular. We figure regular is a good base for comparison. We order a regular size drink to share and we’re on our way. The meal comes to about $17. We find a table, fill up our peanut bin and munch away until our number is called.

This is what takes the longest time. Now I see where the peanuts come in to play. We were waiting for kind of a while for “fast food.” I’d say about 10-15 minutes. Keep in mind all they do are burgers. Ok, you can get a hot dog, but who does that where burger is in the name of the restaurant? They should be poppin’ these puppies out. Our number is finally called. I’m already pissy, but fine, let’s try this remarkable burger.
Much to my surprise the regular size burger comes with two patties. Score! Mine looked a little overcooked and like the cheese may not be melted. Things are not looking up for me:

Let’s take a look at his:

Boringsville. But hey, that’s how he ordered it. Ketchup only. Snoozefest….
Anyway. Our fries are piled high, looking pretty tasty, and our burgers are ready to be eaten.

Yeah, not great. As I suspected, the cheese isn’t melted and the burger is overcooked. The fries are better than In-N-Out, but again, I don’t
love In-N-Out fries the way others seem to. The grilled onions were tasty, but not as good as In-N-Out and the grilled mushrooms were, dare I say it, nasty. Very rubbery texture which is not great when it comes to mushrooms.

The biggest issue we both agreed upon was that the burger fell apart. Ok, mine fell apart because there was so much stuff on it, but his did too, and that just doesn’t make sense. Why are the burgers crumbly? Oh, because they’re overcooked? Maybe…just sayin’.

Yes, we ate the whole thing, we did pay for it and all. Are you seeing the piece of cheese hanging out wondering why he wasn’t cool enough to get some face time with the grill? What’s up with that?
Ok, so the moral of this story (and many others) is, when everyone and their mothers love it, it probably isn’t all that.